Ikebukuro Division: Buster Bros!!! Drama Track 1
Ichiro: Man, what’s with all the racket? I’m trying to read the latest volume of this light novel I’ve been looking forward to here.
Jiro: Nii-chan, are you really forming a new crew? Let me join!
Saburo: Ichi-nii, I’m sorry for bothering you while you’re reading, but if you let a dumbass like Jiro join your crew, he’ll just damage your reputation! That’s why you should let me join! If you let me join,I’d help grow your reputation even more!
Jiro: Who’re you callin’ a dumbass, Saburo?! Why don’t you try sayin’ that again!
Saburo: I’ll say it as many times as you like. You’re a dumbass, Jiro. I mean, you’re always so quick to resort to violence after all. What more evidence do I need that you’re a total dumbass!
Jiro: Wanna take this outside, you little shitbag?! I’ll do Nii-chan a favor and straighten out that demented little personality of yours for him!
Saburo: Haa, what a pain. Ichi-nii, if you’ll excuse me, I need a moment to teach this over-grown dumbass just how stupid he is.
Ichiro: Oh would you two shut up already? How many times do I have to tell you, you’re family so you should act like it. Plus, I’m not interested in teaming up with you guys.
Jiro & Saburo: Whaa?! Why?!
Ichiro: Hypnosis Mic battles aren’t as easy as you guys think.
Jiro: If I…
Saburo: But…
Ichiro: Ugh, I have to take this so just be quiet for a sec. Hello. Oh, Ramuda, I haven’t heard that voice for ages. How’s it hangin’? Haha, figured as much. So? What’cha need?
Jiro: As if a middle school brat like you could ever back up Ichiro. He totally just turned us down like that because you’re here. ’cause he’s such a nice guy, he’s just tryin’ to let you down easy.
Saburo: Haa, what a joke. You’re actually so stupid I literally don’t have the words. Ichi-nii is just that nice, so he probably said no out of concern for your incompetent dumb ass.
Ichiro: Got it. Talk to you later. I like how you two start fighting right after I told you to knock it off. Listen to me, would you?
Jiro: B-But, Nii-chan…
Saburo: I-Ichi-nii, I was just…
Ichiro: Jiro. Saburo. I don’t ever wanna hear weak-ass excuses like that spouting from your mouths.
Jiro & Saburo: Ah!
Ichiro: Plus, you… Ugh… Hello? ...I guess this is the day everyone comes out of the woodwork to call me, huh? Oh! No, nothing, I was just talking to myself. I haven’t heard from you in ages, Jakurai-san. What’s up? Yes.
Saburo: You know, it’s your fault Ichi-nii yelled at us.
Ichiro: Yes...
Saburo: You should apologize to me.
Jiro: Why do I gotta be the one to apologize? You should be doin’ the apologizin’, Saburo!
Saburo: Could you try keeping it down? Ichi-nii’s on the phone. Idiots are just impossible to deal with because they just start yowling at the drop of a hat.
Jiro: You really like writin’ checks with that mouth of yours. I really hope your ass is prepared to cash ’em!
Saburo: Hah! That sounds like a line right out of a crappy C-movie, I can hardly contain my laughter!
Jiro: I’ll beat your goddamn face in!
Saburo: I’d like to see you try! Gah!
Jiro: Ow!
Ichiro: Knock it off already!
Jiro: O-Ouch, that hurt.
Saburo: Uuh, that was mean.
Ichiro: So you wanna team up with me that badly, huh?
Jiro & Saburo: Of course!
Ichiro: Alright, then I’ve got a test for you.
Jiro & Saburo: We’ll do anything!
Ichiro: Good. I’m gonna let you two handle the two jobs that just came in.
Saburo: What kind of jobs are they?
Jiro: See, this is why you’ll always be a dumb kid, Saburo. Nii-chan's word is law. Don’t ask questions, just do what he tells you and that’s it, no problemo.
Ichiro: Jiro, shut up. I’m glad you trust me, but what did I tell you about blind devotion?
Jiro: Oh, uh, right, sorry, Nii-chan.
Saburo: Ahahaha! You’re such a stupid moron! You got yelled at!
Ichiro: Saburo! You behave too. How many times do I gotta tell you to respect your brother?
Saburo: S-Sorry, Ichi-nii.
Ichiro: Haa… The jobs I’ve got for you are from Ramuda Amemura and Jakurai Jinguji. We used to rap together.
Jiro & Saburo: You mean, in The Dirty Dawg?!
Ichiro: The one and only. Jiro, the job I want you to do is for Mr. Jakurai. An acquaintance of his is being harassed by a stalker. He wants us to find out where she’s hiding. Here are the documents he sent over. Use these as a starting point.
Jiro: Okay! I got it, Nii-chan!
Ichiro: I’m counting on you. And Saburo, for you I have a job from Ramuda. He seems to want information on a Gentaro Yumeno. Here’s the background on that.
Saburo: Oh, leave it to me, Ichi-nii! I’ll meet your expectations for sure!
Ichiro: Haha, I’m sure you will. If you manage to complete these jobs, I’ll think about letting you join up with me a little.
Jiro & Saburo: Yay! We’ll be back!
Ichiro: Jobs from those two can’t be easy. I’m sure they’ll be back in no time, crying because they couldn’t do it. And hopefully they’ll lay off about joining me.
Jiro: Nii-chan, I found out where that stalker Mr. Jakurai was looking for was!
Saburo: Ichi-nii, I collected a bunch of info on that Gentaro Yumeno person Mr. Ramuda was interested in!
Ichiro: S-Seriously?
Jiro: I got back first.
Saburo: Uhh, no I did.
Ichiro: It hasn’t even been a full day yet but you’re already done?
Jiro & Saburo: Yep!
Ichiro: Well, why don’t you just report your findings for now. Jiro, you go first.
Jiro: That stalker lady I was looking for was a total psycho. Apparently she stabbed some host from Shinjuku and the police were after her. She was on the run all over the place, but I worked my ass off to find her. I heard she was staying in room 1010 at a cheap hotel on the outskirts of Shinjuku Division.
Ichiro: You did damn well finding someone on the run from the police.
Jiro: Of course! I mean, I am your little brother after all. I might not have as many bros as you, but I did my best to do what I thought you’d do and made some friends in each division. So, I got some intel from a street gang in Shinjuku Division and that’s how I found her.
Ichiro: Haha, damn Jiro!
Jiro: Hehe.
Saburo: Grrr. Ichi-nii, can I go next?
Ichiro: Sure, go ahead.
Saburo: Here’s all the information I could find on Gentaro Yumeno.
Ichiro: Holy shit. You really dug up a lot in just a day.
Saburo: Oh, this is nothing really. I gathered some preliminary information that one darkweb site, and then met with an acquaintance of Gentaro Yumeno’s to confirm the veracity of the information I collected, so I’m 100% confident in its accuracy!
Ichiro: I haven’t read the whole thing yet, but you organized it well so it’s easy to understand.
Saburo: Um, could you––Never mind… Thank you very much.
Ichiro: Wow, Saburo, I’m impressed.
Saburo: Heheh.
Ichiro: I’m gonna hurry up and get them this info. Gimme a sec.
Jiro: Well, my job was obviously way harder, so I’ve got this cinched.
Saburo: Now that’s hilarious. However you wanna square it, I clearly won. You just have to take one look at the documents I prepared. I mean, Jiro, you just gave a verbal report and I prepared a proper written one and everything. If this were a real job, it’d be painfully apparent which was more valuable.
Jiro: Hah! If I ever needed an example of how insecure losers can’t shut their traps, I’d just have to point at you right now. You keep running your mouth because you’re scared I beat you.
Saburo: Geh. Hahaha, I’ve really gotta hand it to you, Jiro, that’s a really awe-inspiring misunderstanding. You deserve a round of applause.
Jiro: Ngh, ahaha, Saburo, you sure are trying hard for a middle school brat to put on a brave face, huh? I really gotta hand it to you.
Saburo: Geh, hehehe.
Jiro: Hahaha.
Ichiro: Ooh, look at you two! Giving each other a round of applause for your hard work? This is how brothers should act.
Jiro & Saburo: Wah!
Ichiro: You two have really grown up fast. I guess I shouldn’t have expected any less from my little brothers.
Saburo: I-I’m honored by your praise. I’m sure I don’t even have to ask, but who won? Me or Jiro?
Jiro: Obviously I did, right, Nii-chan?
Ichiro: Huh, who won? What are you talking about?
Jiro & Saburo: What?!
Ichiro: I said I’d test you, but I never said it was a competition, did I?
Jiro: Th-Then you mean you weren’t gonna let one of us join you…?
Ichiro: Yeah, pretty much. I didn’t give you those jobs for that. But, well..
Saburo: “But, well…”?
Ichiro: To be honest, I wasn’t expecting this outcome. I figured you guys wouldn’t be able to finish either job. But you two got it done crazy fast!
Jiro: Hehe.
Saburo: Haha.
Ichiro: So I guess I gotta give you guys a real answer then. Here.
Jiro: Um, uh, Nii-chan, what’s with this mic?
Ichiro: I want you two to show me your skills.
Saburo: Oh! Okay, Ichi-nii! Let me go first.
Saburo:
Who you callin' middle school? I'm in the deep end of the pool
Just 'cause I'm a kid don't play me for a fool
My flow is second to none
Well, it is true, I am the third son but what's my birthday
Really matter in all this?
I'm always looking higher, higher, higher
Just lemme handle Ichi-nii's cover fire
It's not pedantic to inquire
Logic leads to victory, so long as I'm still around, I know we'll be fine
Ichiro: Damn, you’re pretty good. The lyrics were very you too.
Saburo: Ah!
Jiro: Listen to mine next, Nii-chan!
Jiro:
I'm up to any task, Any time my brother asks
Just gimme a call, I'll be there in no time at all
I'm stronger than I seem, so just gimme a chance
There's only one thing I wanna be
The champion all the world wants to see
But I'm not there yet, I mean even I know that much
But I'm clawing my way up there to a new place or another
Huh?! Hear my praise of my brother
I'm Jiro, M.B., the strongest middle bro
Ichiro: Man, you really surprised me with your sick flow and snappy rhymes.
Jiro: Hehe.
Ichiro:
You’ve definitely proven that your rap skills are a head above the rest. But the Hypnosis Mic battles between Division representatives are much crueler than you realize. I’m gonna use my Hypnosis Mic to rap and if you two can withstand it, I’ll invite you to join my crew myself.
Jiro & Saburo: Okay!
Ichiro:
Ay-yo, don't take back what you said
Word is rule, Don't spit on the call of your soul
What is that gun in your hand gonna do?
Take things away, that's all. That good enough for you?
This is a new age where the power of words takes the stage
This mic works directly on your eardrums
Puts you under its hypnotic spell
I'll change the future with my rhymes
Everyone raise your voices for a new world
Jiro: Ughh… Nii-chan really is amazing. Even if he’s going easy on us, his power’s overwhelming.
Saburo: Nghh… Ichi-nii’s incredible. But that’s why I want to become a man worthy of standing by his side.
Ichiro: I guess it’s still a little too soon for you guys. W-Woah!
Jiro: Ngh, hehe. I barely made it back.
Saburo: Ah, I’m gonna make myself worthy of standing by your side, Ichi-nii.
Ichiro: Ahahaha!
Jiro: S-So…
Saburo: …does this mean you’ll let us join you?
Ichiro: Nope, not like that.
Jiro & Saburo: Oh…
Ichiro: Heh, what’d I tell you? If you could get through that I’d invite you to join myself.
Jiro & Saburo: Oooh!
Ichiro: Jiro. Saburo. Would you please form a crew with me? The three of us brothers can change the world together.
Jiro & Saburo: Of course!